Angles Among Us

Welcome back! If this is your first time joining this blog, welcome. Please feel free to read through past blogs. We are a family with two biological sons who have Down syndrome (Caleb - almost 7 & Joshua - 3). The purpose of this blog is to encourage those who have loved ones with DS and to educate those who do not. I pray you enjoy!

Too often I go through life without taking time to see the blessings all around me. More times than not my "blessings" are people, not things or money... "angels" if you will! I want to dedicate this blog to just a few of the "angles" in my life.

The first angel I would like to mention is Tina Whitby. She is one of my most cherished friends! Tina and I have been friends for ten years now. She is one of those friends that I want to become! I can talk to her about anything and know that she will love me, yet she will give me her honest opinion. She has been at my side during some of my happiest and darkest moments. It was Tina (9 months pregnant herself) who decorated my house for the homecoming of Caleb. It was Tina who saw fatigue setting in, so she took Caleb when he was a baby for the night. It was Tina who ALWAYS saw Caleb as just a boy, looking past his Down syndrome, even when I could not! Than it was Tina's house that became Caleb's second home when Joshua arrived. The first 18 months of Joshua's life was spent at doctor's appointments, surgeries, and week long hospital stays. Where was Caleb? At Aunt Tina's, of course! Aunt Tina is Caleb's favorite! In fact one time I forgot to send a show-and-tell object to school with Caleb. The teacher said he stood proudly before his classmates and announced, "Aunt Tina!" Followed with some Caleb jargon and then a few more, "Aunt Tina!"'s.

It was Tine who quite literally took the fall for Caleb once. We were at a Christmas bowling party and Caleb took off running down the very slick, greased isle. With out hesitation Tina took off after him, breaking his fall. Caleb was just fine, Aunt Tina on the other hand fell HARD! Tina came up saying, "All I could think about was Caleb's neck! I just could not let him hit his head!" Caleb's neck has some laxity that makes him more susceptible to serious spinal injuries. With out regret, Tina spent almost 6 months recovering from protecting Caleb! (Frank and I felt horrible for her!) Tina and her family are not just great friends, they are family! To call Tina a "friend" is not a strong enough term, a sister is a bit closer, but I prefer ANGEL. Tina is truly a God send in my life! (I love you Tina and am blessed because of you!)

Because Caleb and Joshua require a bit more attention than other kids their ages (both still in diapers, speech delays, no two way conversation... just to name a few things), we can't leave them with just any one. We need to know that whoever watches them is physically and mentally able to accept the challenge. Date nights are few and far between, to say the least... God has sent a "family of angels" into our life to offer a little reprieve.

Barb and Jeff Hannah have become the boys' "Illinois Grandparents"! The first time Barb suggested bring the boys to their house so Frank and I could go on a date we smiled and said, "Awe, that is so nice. Thanks, we may have to do that!" But not really sure how serious they were, we just let it drop. Barb called me a few times before we put it on the calendar. To be quite honest, she had to almost pursue me to watch the boys. We did not want to burden them. We saw our boys as a challenge, so we expected everyone to see them that way (shame on us). The Hannah's truly saw our boys as a blessing! That touched my soul to the deepest part of my being! Having the boys over became a family ordeal, their daughters (Jody & Jackie) would come home from college for the night just to spend time with Caleb and Joshua! Jody even bought Caleb a touch and feel book and Joshua a Build-A-Bear just because she thought they would like them. She was right! We know that the boys are having a great time and are in a safe place when they are with the Hannah's! We now feel like we can call and ask if the boys can come over, rather than make them hunt us down. By loving our boys they have loved us! (Thank you Hannah's! We all love you!)

Finally, I can not mention "angels" with out talking about my own Mom! After having children of my own my relationship with my Mom has gone from Mother-Daughter to Mother-Mother relationship. She has dropped everything to be with after the birth of both boys. A few times she has spent a week at time with Caleb while Joshua was in the hospital. My step-dad (Steve), though being newly weds and not having children of his own, did not hesitate to let her leave. She has accommodated for their needs when we visit and allowed them to just be boys! Mom is an incredible Grandma!

To be honest I never truly understood the love of a mother until I became one! This journey of being a mother of special needs kids has been an emotional challenge for me, but I did not understand that it could be an emotional challenge for my Mom as well... I called her one afternoon when Caleb was still a toddler, I was so burdened by the path before me I could not see straight. I was just venting, crying, & morning to my Mom when she began to cry as well, "Betsy, I just wish I could take this pain away for you! I wish I could make it all better!" I froze... My mom was saying the exact words that I had uttered to Caleb so many times, only she was saying them to ME! It was a revelation: my Mom loves me as much as I love Caleb! She wants to take away MY pain! She wants ME to have the best life possible! She feels for ME the way I feel for MY boys! Now when my Mom tells me that she loves me or that she is proud of me, I hear it differently... Because I know what it like to see my children face challenges and over come them! Mom is a God-send, an Angel! (I love you, mom!)

Take some time to look at your own life... because there truly are ANGELS AMONG US!